My PWS story
Hello all, I have recently "come out of the closet" about my PWS. I did not know that my birthmark was even called a port-wine stain until coming across this site. I am 39 years old; I have a 20 year old beautiful daughter. My entire life has been centered around this birthmark. It covers the whole left side of my face, part of my ear, bottom lip, chin, and part of my neck. I attended elementary school and Jr High with NO makeup. I found makeup when I turned 15. So needless to say EVERYONE knew about it. I was ridiculed, teased, chased home from school, and bullied almost every day of my life during those years of school.
My story is not a story of strength, happiness or high self-esteem to say the least. After an abusive childhood, and being moved around from family member to family member, my path in life took a turn for the worse. When I was a little over 17 years old I turned to drugs as my closest and dearest friend. I had zero self-esteem, and the drugs made me feel better. I used drugs for 20 years. I put God and everyone else who cared for me on the back burner. I didnít feel I deserved to be loved. I believed I was a freak.
After several arrests, depression, loss of loved ones that I never said goodbye to, and never can, putting my child in serious danger almost every day of her life, I decided it was time to change.
Something so simple had taught me how to live life on life's terms, and do it clean and sober. Itís called Narcotics Anonymous. I put every ounce of myself into getting clean and sober. I started attending college to become a substance abuse counselor. I got my family back and most of all, their trust back, and I am in love with the greatest man ever.
I went to a NA meeting just the other night without any makeup on. This was the most scared I have been since being a child. I cried, threw up, and wouldnít look at anyone. I shared about how this is the real me and looked up at everyone. NO one flinched, no one called me names, and no one said I was a freak. As a matter of fact I was embraced, told I was loved no matter what, and that I am beautiful. For the first time in almost 40 years I believed it.
I have been clean and sober for 2 1/2 years. I am in therapy for my self-esteem issues. I've come a long way. I taught my daughter to love everyone unconditionally. Donít ever judge anyone on how they look. To my knowledge she never has. If I learned anything from this life with PWS it is that God loves us all, has made us who we are supposed to be. If I didnít have this PWS I might not be well on my way to help addicts change their lives.
Life is too short to let the words of children and adults destroy your entire life. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY. THEY CAN'T BRING YOU DOWN! Only if you let them!
Thank you for reading my story. Love and peace!! (Feel free to reply)
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