7 yr old son has LM -left cheek - Vascular Birthmarks Foundation Forum
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Old 11-22-2013, 03:00 PM
rachelroyer rachelroyer is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2013
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Default 7 yr old son has LM -left cheek

Hello, my name is Rachel. I'm the proud mother of Connor, who was born with an LM in his left cheek. The LM is microcystic in nature, but large enough to leave his face very unsymmetrical. Connor has been through many, many procedures in his 7 years including surgical resection, steroid injections and laser therapy. Unfortunately, he just hasn't had the wonderful results I hear so many people speak of.

I'm so extremely proud of Connor for not allowing his facial deformity to prohibit him from doing anything. He is, by far, the most confident human being I know. In all honesty, he doesn't see anything different about himself or his "big cheek". For that reason I feel I'm walking a very fine line. If he's confident in who he is and how he looks, who am I to say any different? By having him go through more procedures, am I creating a problem where there is currently no problem for him? Should I wait until he's a bit older and possibly ready on his own? It's something that I go back and forth with and I just don't know the "right" answer.

I was just wondering if anyone else has found themselves in the type of situation.
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Old 11-23-2013, 03:01 PM
missy missy is offline
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 1,794

Hi and welcome!

I don't think there is a right answer. You have to do what your instincts tell you to do.

However, Conner sounds like a wonderful young man. This is something he will have to deal with as he ages, and he needs to know that. I have a ten year old with autism, the classic variety. As he had gotten older, really starting at about eight, I started letting him help manage things. He needs a special diet, so I started letting him plan his own meals. He started going to the school meetings and having to speak for himself about what he needs.

Conner sounds like the kind of boy who could handle that, too. Since you're asking, why not ask him? I was pleasantly surprised by my son and how well he adjusted to the additional responsibility.

So my vote is to discuss this with Conner very openly. He can't have the final say, but he could have a voice ... after all, it's his face.

Let us know how things go and best of luck to you and to Conner.

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